You can't "bank" on these people....

It is uncanny how certain jarring experiences in my life make me restart writing my blog after a long sabbatical. I guess such experiences jolt me out of my slumber and make me want to get off my lazy bum and actually do something.

Now, me being part of a respectable organisation in India, have been provided with a salary account with ICICI bank. This account has numerous "special" benefits, unlimited use of interbank ATMs all across India being one of them. This, on the face of it, looks like a great benefit. But in reality, it turned out anything but that for me.
On that fateful day, 30/08/2008, I had stepped out to make a high value purchase for myself. After I was done buying the said item, the shopkeeper announced that I would be charged a 1.5% surcharge on purchase by a debit card. Now people of my caste are often said to be extremely "careful" with money.(Misers would be a better way to put it right?;-)) I am no different. In order to save that 1.5%, i ventured into the nearest ATM in order to withdraw the requisite amount in cash.

Now the ATM was a HDFC machine. Since I had the so called priviledge of free interbanking, I didn’t even think twice before entering my card in the machine. After punching in my code and the 5 digit amount required, I waited for quite a few uneasy seconds till the machine did its thing. In the end, all I got was a message on the screen saying "Sorry! Transaction timed out" I didn’t get any cash in my hand. Now, just on a hunch, I checked my balance, I checked my balance and it showed the said amount debited to my account even though I had received no cash in my hand. In horror, I rushed out and told the guard there that such an incident had occurred. He assured me saying that "Happens. It’s a machine. It will get reversed" With not much choice left, I left the ATM.

After arranging for cash to purchase the item I had selected, I rushed to my neighbourhood ICICI bank branch and told them what had transpired. Very cooly, I was told to call the customer care number as the branch was only meant for CASA (current account and savings account). No customer complaints could be handled there. They didnt even have authority to call the customer service from their own telephones!!!I huffed and puffed and called the said number. There my complaint was noted down and I was told very nicely that it would take 8 working days for me to get my money back. I thanked the guy, grunted and cut the call.
Couple of days later, on my mother's insistence, I read the various papers ICICI had given me after opening the account. There, in very small print, was written that the bank cannot be held responsible for any discrepancies involving interbanking transactions.

Which brings me to the question that do all these private banks provide customers with so called “priviledge” services only to shake their hands off any trouble that comes their way? Their system is designed in such a robust way that once a discrepancy occurs, the customer is completely at the bank’s mercy for getting his compliant resolved. That’s not what I was taught in marketing under CRM i.e. Customer Relationship Marketing. CRM looks to keep the customer delighted with the service and make sure he remains your customer. Well, I am on the verge of closing one of my accounts with ICICI. So their CRM has resulted in making me a disgruntled and visibly angry customer. Quite the opposite of what they set out to do.

Now what if someone was in dire need of money and the machine had acted the same way with him? What would that poor chap have done? Account would have no money and no money in hand as well. NO CRM in the world would have got him to do business with the said bank again! You simply cant' "bank" on any bank anymore is what I feel.

I feel, the more we shift towards machines, the more complex our lives and errors in them are going to become.
But as they say all is well that ends well. I got my money back after about 8 days. But the moral of the story remains; I shall never use my card for an interbank transaction again. And the best part is, I wrote this entire blog on the very item I had stepped out to purchase when this whole rigmarole happened. My spanking new Nokia E71. But then that, is a subject of another post….

Mocha..Ka????

To begin, Ka = Why in marathi.

MOCHA IS OPENING UP IN PUNE!! I had been hearing this from NUMEROUS excited people for quite a few months now. Now never having sampled the Mumbai Mocha(to which people go from Pune just for a coffee!!). I was reserving my excitement uptill i went in myself and tasted the goods. However, the amount of time those jokers took to open up the joint would have made a sloth proud. From the initial date of 25th June, it finally opened on the 1st of August amidst a lot of fanfare and a fair share of glitterati.

4th of August marks the birthday of one of my very cute friends, Ms. PS. I had been invited to her party in Sharvaree. After the party she suggested we all troop into Mocha and spend some time there. So we all(8 of us) made our way there. I landed there first and was aghast to find that there was a queue of people waiting to get in. I said, WTF???.This is a coffee place right?? Since when did they start having waiting?? And SECURITY??. Yes there was a security guard manning the closed gate, opening it ever so slightly to let someone in or out! Maaazzzz i say!

On inquiry at the gate, we were greeted by a very prim and propah lady told us that we would have to wait 30 mins for a table. On hearing that, six of us decided to bunk the idea and move to Barista instead. However, two of the group wanted to get in badly and evidently struck a deal with one of the waiters and managed to get us in. Now we all seated indoors(as the outside was full of people smoking hookah...hence no place) and were brought the menu cards. One look at the prices and i had smoke coming out of my pockets. There was a Cappuchino for Rs. 20 and after that things went up exponentially. Next cheapest was Rs. 75 which went way upto Rs. 280 for a cup of some special gold dusted coffee i assume!! The ambience of the place was more like a lounge bar than a coffee place. Smoky lighting, dark decor, funny music and even funnier people. Not something to my aste honestly!.

Now since no one was coming over to take our order(most of us werent planning ot have anything anyway), we got fed up and just got up and walked out! Judging from the desperation of people to get in, we must have been the first people in the history of Mocha, Pune to get a table and voluntarily walk out of there without ordering! We promptly trudged into Barista and sat there for 45 mins without ordering a thing!

I give Mocha BIG thumbs down as of now. As of now, the are exhibiting MAAZZZ!(Again, for non-maharashtrians, Mazz = Concietment). Lets see if i change my mind after a month.My advise:Unless your desperate or incredibly loaded, give Mocha a miss!!

Saturday Night Fever...

No!This is not a post about the hit 70s movie by the same name...Au contrere.....Its about a comic anecdote from my very real life....

It all started with a dinner plan, that for a change, was planned well in advance(5 hours!!). All were to congregate at 8:30 pm at Mr. S's place and then head out together. Now i anticipate the late arriving tendencies of my friends(weve been together for about 14 years now, so i think i can take a fair guess!!) and go 20 minutes late. And voila!..For the first time, iam not the first one to arrive. Mr. P had arrived first. So we both got talking downstairs till Mr. S arrived. As soon as he gt down, he stuck his cellphone ot his ear and walked the equivalent of about 3 kms by the time he was finished. Till the Mr. SG and his fiance Ms. AV also made their appearance. After the usual indecision on where to go, we decided to Ambrosia since we had a Ms. AV's Santro at our disposal. So off we went discussing everything from our common friends to football on the way.

On getting there we approach the Maitre'D and ask him for a table for 5. We get the standard "saturday night in a restaurant in Pune" reply.."Thatl be 15-20 minutes Sir"..So he takes down my name and cell phone number(talk about slick!!) in his diary....and we head out to the lawn at the rear of the restaurant to while away the time.Now personally i hate having to wait for a table at a restaurant.Its like standing in queue to eat(which i incidently hate as well). Nevertheless, we were sitting there discussing something bout someones and somethings..me and AV were fiddling with SG's MotoRAZR V3i...and suddenly, i get a call on my phone...its the Maitre'D.."Your table is ready sir"...Wow!..Real Slick i say...

So we all walk up to our table and get seated...we unfortunately get a table which doesnt face the TV...Czech Republic Vs. Ghana is on....and Ghana are leading 1-0...i say...this looks interesting....however we park our butts on the chairs and start to look around..admiring the ambience and all that jazz...soon we get the menu cards and order soups with a plethora of starters....i rub my hands in glee..Food!!...

The soups came and we started to dig into them like Bangladeshi refugees! Now as we are waiting for our starters to arrive, AV suddenly announces that her cars keys are missing...And as SG was responsible for them, we all look at him expecting him to pull a David Blaine and conjour the keys out of thin air. But alas! Nothing that magical was about to happen! We had a full blown crisis now. We immediately trooped out to the place where we had been chatting so animatedly before and scoured the entire perimeter looking for our keys. Leaves were parted, branches moved, ground kicked and hands dirtied. But to no avail. We came up with zilch. AV had by that time called her dad and told him about our little mishap and inquired if the spare keys were handy. Suddenly, one of our buddies, PP calls us in excitedly. He had found the keys!!! We rush to him like Superman to Lois Lane(only in the speedy sense) to inquire. Evidently a kindly gentleman had found the keys on the parapet and held on to them. Bless him!We all returned to our table euphoric at our stroke of luck!

Now by this time our starters had arrived and had gone stone cold. I requested the waiter close by to kindly re-heat them for us. However, he flatly refused. Now that left me kinda miffed. However, not wanting to create a scene, we all sat down and began to devour the food. WIth those down, the main course was ordered and more waiting was to be had.

Now al this while, there was this group of people sitting opposite us. A couple, one of their parents and one of their sisters. Now they were sitting with their back to me. We were chatting in general when i AV suddenly started to snicker and elbowed SG. I inquired as to what was afoot and was told that the "mother of all PDAs" was under progress behind me. That guy was going at his girlfriend/wife with all he had. MAJOR PDA! And in full view of the family. And other patrons as well. Now ordinarily iam a strong proponant of PDA, but this was getting ridiculous. They were one step away from making out right there on the table. Our food arrived(and so did theirs) and all the while we were eating i could guess that the show was still on judging by AVs reactions.

Now halfway through our meal we heard a commotion going on at the PDA table. Evidently the hotel had charged them for a dish of prawns(which they had sent back cause they didnt like it) which the man there termed as "bad food". He demanded the cook be summoned which he was. The entire family was under the influence. The 2 men in particular. Now the cook was not one to be cowed down by a man so obviously under the influence. He stuck to his stand that "this hotel does not serve bad food". So the man now got down to abuse. "I wanna talk to the f*****g owner. What the f**k do u think you are serving? I want his f******g mobile number!"."Its not a question of the f*****g money. I can trhow that on your face. But i dont expect to be charged for f*****g bad food!" On this the cook coolly replied that nothing of that sort was necessary and possible. So the manager was called and evidently everything was settled. They were packed off with a complimentary serving of prawns i think. Now if what ive seen in the program "When chefs attack" is anything to go by, that dish of prawns they got complimentary had quite a few moret hings "complimentary" in it!!

By this time we had finished with our dinner and walked out with this drunk group as they prepared to leave. On the way the girl asked her hubby/boyfriend "Do u think i should drive?". On whick i let loose from behind.."Yeah i think you should!". Now i dont know if they heard me or not, but they didnt say a thing. We all crammed ourselves in to the car and let out a hearty laugh. What a night!!

Inhumanity Unplugged

Friday, 9th June, 2006, 2:20 pm

I was on my way to office from my house after having a particularly satisfying lunch. I was riding my bike at ease(65 km/h is at ease for me) when i suddenly come across a Thane registered silver Maruti Esteem parked on the side of the road. The driver's door was open, and a man was opening the rear left side of the car. The man got inside the car and started brutally beating up someone sitting in the back seat. Initially I thought this was a case of road rage. I stopped and to my horror i saw that the person in the back seat was a yound boy no older than 10! And that man was presumably his father! He was brutally assaulting the boy with punches and kicks while the boy tried to sheild the blows with raised hands covering his face. The man stopped the beating in about 1 min and got out of the car and started hurling unmentionable abuses at the young child . By now a large crowd had gathered around the car. At the same time, a woman, presumably his wife, got down from the passenger seat of the car. I was hit like a punch in the gut when i saw that she was bleeding from the head. The man must have obviously assaulted her too. Her head had a gash and she was bleeding profusely. I had seen enough. I asked two guys on a bike to hold the guy off while i went and got the police. I peeled out of there like a bat out of hell and made my way to the police chowkey which was about 100 m from the spot of the incident. Apparently, the had seen the commotion and I saw 2 havaldars on their way over. I went to the chowkey nevertheless and confirmed if they were indeed going to the accident spot. I got an answer in the affirmative and I zoomed my way over to the spot again. But by this time the guy had fled and the police were puttering on their slow 100 cc Hero Honda after him, looking slightly bemused. I caught up with them and explained the whole thing to them. Another burly guy(about 22) was riding alongside us, looking as shaken as me. We asked the police's permission to chase the guy down and hold him till they caught up. On receiving the go-ahead, 4 of us, two guys on a Pulsar, the burly guy and me weaved like maniacs through the relatively moderate traffic chasing the Esteem and finally managed to intercept the guy in front of the Law College tennis coutrs. We signalled him to stop but he wouldnt heed. Finally i got right in front of him and stopped my bike in the middle of the road. He stopped as well and asked me angrilly as to why he had been stopped. By now a large huge traffic snarl was happening behind us. The police arrived just as the guy got out of his car. He saw the two policemen and quickly got back in his car and ran away. As we started our bikes to give chase again, the police sounded out the law to us. "This is a domestic squabble. We cannot apprehend him unless his wife lodges a complaint with us.Let him go". The 5 of us gathered there looked at each other helplessly. The burly guy remarked "Tyala dharun khup badvayla hava hota!"(We should have caught him and bashed him up!). Another elderly gentleman who had stopped remaked "Kasa zhala aahe manus aajkaal!"(What has happened to mankind nowadays?)

I turned my bike around and headed for office. Along the way i was thinking that what has happened to humanity today. Out of the 50 people gathered there why were only 4 of us acting for assistance? The same thing happens during the case of accidents as wel. That woman was badly hurt and in need of help. I will never forget that image of her crying helplessly in the front seat as the guy ran after seeing the police. Are we not living in a civil society? What can possess a man to manhandle his wife and children so brutally? And is domestic violence not punishable if it happens in broad daylight in front of 50 people? Why must the wife complain?

The answer to these questions will be simple and the same. "Its the system that need a change". What system? Who made this system? We did! And if we as citizens of the country cant help a woman and child from the brutality of her husband, we bloody well change it then!!

No Show!

"We unlock the code tonite!".This was the message i sent AW after i got tickets(from ticket point) for the Da Vinci Code. 10.45 pm, Friday night, E Square. Now, having read the book and being completely bowled over by it, I was naturally excited about watching the cinematic adaptation of Dan Brown's best. And knowing that Ron Howard had directed it and Tom Hanks was in it made it all the more alluring. I remember Ron Howard as a 18 year old kid acting in a sitcom called Happy Days which ran in the USA in the 60s. So feels a bit weird to see him so much older and directing now.

Now, after having a particularly enjoyable evening on Friday on the hill and in Barista, i had settled down in front of my laptop to play Need For Speed: Underground 2. I was in the middle of a particularly tough Street X race.2 Laps out of 4 down and i was in third position. Bad state. Suddenly my cell phone starts to croon Sweet Child of Mine. I curse, pause the game and answer the call. Its Ticket Point. "Iam sorry sir. But tonites show at E Square for Da Vinci Code has been cancelled due to techinical difficulties". I say "WTF????" I am a bit stunned at this sudden unpleasant turn of events. So i dont react and jump down the throat of that ticket point person. I get back to my game now. At this point of time i am quite incensed. Which consequently makes me pull out 2 of my greatest Street X laps ever and win the race with a lead time of 6.43 secs! Now after that rush, i call up AW and tell her teh bad news. She, surprisingly, is pretty reticent about the whole thing. We decide to go to E Square and take a chance anyways. However, AW reaches there at 10:00 pm and starts to shhot off at the person at the ticket counter. He announces that there is no show at 10:45(Although their board and screen show it as housefull!). So now i cal back the ticket point guy and yell at him. But to no avail. He just assures me a full refund and thats it. I cut his call in between his defence. Iam that mad!

So AW and I deicide to take our chance with the 11:30 pm show. She has left 500 bucks with the guy at the ticket counter(which left him as confused as a baby in a topless bar..thats a Sidhuism by the way) so that we can pouch the tickets if any should rear up. So i drag my dejected butt to E Square and join AW and her hubby in the food court. As soon as AW sees me she retorts "Are evdha ka padla aahe chehra...Its just a movie!".(Again, for non-maharashtrains or non-indians "Why you so glum...Its just a movie!"). I give her a weak smile and snatch her N91 away from her and start to tinker with it. Just for something to do. We discuss the various "amazing" features of the phone for a while(with AW telling me in between to take a deep breath, relax and cheer up) till their Dosas arrive. They start to nibble on their south indian preperation while i still play with AW's phone.We then move down to the ticket counter to find out if our 500 buck carrot worked. AW suddenly has a brain wave and askes her hubby(Mr. SC) to go to the ticket pointer counter and just present them with the coupon. He promptly rushes off while we sit outside chatting up.

Soon we see SC come out with a smug grin on his face and with three tickets in his hand. AW gives him this awesomely happy smile and we congratulate him on his charm and how the next time if i had problems i knew who to call. We check the ticket to see which screen the movie is on and proceed towards Screen 1. We are sitting on a bench there discussing the reservation controvesy when i just glance at the tickets to see what seats we had. And thats when i see it. Right there, printed in big black letters, impossible to miss. X MEN 3! That moron at the ticket point counter had given us ticklets to X MEN 3! And we being bigger morons had not checked!

We truged our way back to the ticket point counter and returned the tickets and got my coupon back. SC grinned sheepishly as we walked back to the car with our tails between our legs. Due to someones miscommunication we had been robbed of an opportunity to see a great movie. We rode back home and AW and SC dropped me off. I shall unlock the code i vowed!..Sunday..I shall!

Capital Memories

Lets rewind to the 10th of March. Mr. DS calls me STD from Delhi at 12:00 am. I say, come on, doesnt this guy sleep?.He starts off with" Sun, ek pen aur paper lekar aa aur main jo kehta hun vo likh le"(Get a pen and paper and write down what iam saying). I say "D its 12 in the night.Cant we do this tomorrow?".But he insists on it. So i get the necessary writing implements and sit groggily on my desk. And then he start giving me my flight details. This could have waited right?. NO, but Mr. Impatient wanted to tell it me then and there. So after the requisite scribbling is complete, he says to me "Ab to tujhe aana hi padega.Ticket ho gayi!"(Now you have to come. Tickets are done!). I say fine dude. Iam there!

Lets forward from the previous rewind to the 3rd of May. DS lands up at my house at 8:00 pm with a full bucket of chiken from KFC. I got hungry is what he tells me. Yeah right!!. So we sit and wolf down 7 pieces out of the 12. I bid goodbye to him at around 10:00 pm and remind him to be ready at 4:30 am the next morning. We had a 6:15 am flight.I give my suitcase(and the stuff in there) a few finishing touches, write a cd for my discman and do a recheck of the "equipment" iam taking along.Alls in order.Iam good to go! Ab dilli dur nahin! (I could say quite literally this time round)

Woke up at 3:30 am. Gosh!.I havent seen what 3:30 am looks like in years!I wake up all groggy and by the time i get ready its 4:35 am. No i start to panic and rush with all my goodbyes and drive my car in a hurry to DS's house. Hes getting a bit hysterical too by then. Soon all bags are in the dicky and we are of to the airport with me at the wheel. We get there in time and complete all the formalities and move out to the runway where we see our plane..KINGFISHER!!!!!

Now we had heard a LOT of good stuff about Kingfisher airlines. And if it was anything as good as the beer they make, we werent going to be dissapointed. And dissapointed we werent!!WOW!It was an incredible experience. Now i have a secret to share here. This was my first airborne experience (since experiences when you are 2 years old are not counted). And what a first experience it was!

The plane was incredibly kitted out. LCD screens for each passenger. Free headphones for each passenger. Yana Gupta coming on and giving out all the pre flight instructions. Excellent food. And to top it off, the Airhostesses were to DIE for!Man! I had decided to take a nap during the flight but it was impossible for me to close my eyes!I would have loved to fly all round India in that flight if they had let me!As we started to approach landing at Delhi airport i got a nice aerial view of the capital city. Saw the Lotus Temple, various 5 start hotels, few schools a few government buildings etc.

After landing, we were transported to the baggage claim section by a bus. Not bad. I was blown away by the sheer size of the Delhi airport!However i really do feel that we can find better names than one of the Gandhis' to name prominent places in our country. I think its the height of sycophancy. Nevertheless, it was a while before our baggage came sliding over the conveyer into out waiting hands. We loaded our trollies and were off to the exit here DS's girlfriend(along with her gorgeous best friend) was waiting for us. We loaded our stuff into her car(a red Swift) and set out to Gurgaon where he stays.

Enroute I had my first dekko as of how Delhi traffic operates. Quite like Pune, only difference being that the 2 wheelers are replaced by cars. So off we went weeding through the rush hour traffic towards a CCD in Green Park. What a way to kick of a monumental(for me atleast..what with all the monuments i was gonna see..*chuckle*) Delhi trip!! Had a great chocolte fantasy though. So with that out of the way we headed off to D's house in Gurgaon. Took us a good 1 hour to get there.

Now as you enter Gurgaon you are simply blown away by the amount of high rises there. Seems like people have seen the movie Vertical Limit too many times!(Bad joke i know!). But, jokes apart, its a great engineering feat. And the number of malls is mind boggling! You would think that all Gurgaonites do is watch movies and shop!We started to approach D's house and as we turn into his complex I am greeted with very well paved driveways and HUGE(by Pune standards atleast) buildings. We ride up the lift to his house on the 6th floor and as soon as we enter i am greeted by my smiling host(his mom). I get an affectionate pat on my face and am promptly led into the guest room where i unload all my stuff. Soon after we are sitting chatting in D's room drininkg lime juice when he announces that we are having lamb for lunch. So he and I set of to a joint called the Red Coral to buy the lamb.

En route, D puts on "Numb" by Linkin Park on his car stereo and we cry ourselves hoarse trying to sing along with Mike Shinoda and the gang. Next up is D generation X. Party time! We soon reach the Red Coral located on MG(thats Mehrauli-Gudgaon not Mahatma Gandhi!) road. We enter in and order us the lamb. We sit cooling our heels(well heating them up considering the AC was kaput!) and talk ventures to the nightclub called Nasha adjacent to this joint.On our entry, we had seen various floral arrangements with mogra flowers which didnt look like an entrance to a nightclub, but something else. Nevertheless....Soon the lamb came and we were on our way. Lunch was a grand spread. Chilly garlic rice, chilli chicken, the lamb, beer, soft drinks, the works!. I ate (and drank) hertily and we were back in D's room fiddling with laptop. Little had we started that it was time for a movie.

So, D, his girlfriend and I bundled into his Ford Ikon and headed off to PVR Metropolitan, a mall, in Gudgaon. En route, i was given running commentry by D about all the malls in the area. I must have seen about 12 different malls in the radius of 5 kms from his house. Wild isnt it!We saw this AMAZIG building which housed Microsoft, Epson and Nokia! Talk about global integration! Then there was an entire mall for furniture only where there are 10 furnished mockups of master bedrooms, guest bedrooms etc!Soon we reached the theatre and got the tickets for Gangster. I entered in to find this huge shopping megacentre. It had everything from bowling alleys to a Bose showroom! We headed up towards the movie halls and soon settled down in our seats. The movie was good. Songs amazing! Quite enjoyable. On our way out we stopped in the BOse showroom to get a demo on their latest home theatre system. MAN! The man sure knows how to make sound systems!Simply mind blowing!With a sticker price of Rs. 2,30,000/- it had better be though.

We got home soon after the movie and i settled down to unpack my back. We had dinner at 8:30. Nice home cooked meal. I enjoyed myself completely. After that we headed to D's room to begin our gaming session for the nite. We started with Cricket 2005 and continued with NFS-Most Wanted upto 4 in the morning!

Next day we were supposed to go to D's aunt's house for lunch. Now both us sleepyheads woke up at 11!His mom began to get hysterical cause we hadnt gotten ready by 12:30. We finally left at 12:40 and headed to GKII to his aunt's house. There again i had amazing Aam panna and then we all settled down for lunch. Lunch was a well spread affair with chicken, dal, salad, boondi ka raita, beans and potatoes and garam garam rotis!Dessert was diced mangoes!Yummmmyyy! At 4:30 we left his aunts house to pick up D's girlfriend and subsequently headed out to Saket, a theatre in GKII again to watch 36 China Town. It was a good movie, well scripted, even if a bit juvinille at times. But fast moving and overall entertaining. We got out of the theatre and i was arguing with a roadside vendor about the price of a second hand Bourne Identity when a TV crew from NDTV India walked up to me and D and asked us if we liked the movie. I answered first and was asked to do so in Hindi. Then i was asked if Shahid and Kareena would get married in real life. D was asked the same questions. We were told that our interviews would be aired at 12:00 am at night on Raat Baaki. Euphoric at our seemingly 15 seconds of fame, we bought ourselves an icecream called Bailey which is icecream with irish cream and liquour. Mmmm...Delicious! We then headed to a place caled Colonel Kababs in Defence Colony to have "authentic mughlai" food, as D put it. We had kheema roti, kheema and murg bhayanker. Was pretty good. I dont know bout authentic, but it sure was scrumptous!After that we headed home and soon settled down to gaming again. At 12:00 am we put on the TV and sat down with baited breath to watch ourselves on TV. Wasn to be. They didnt air the piece and we watched in dissapointment as the show ended. To perk ourselves up, we got back to gaming and played on till 3:00 am!

Saturday was going to be sightseeing day for me!We headed out at around 12, picked up D's girlfriend and then moved towards India Gate. It took us a good 1 hour to get there.On the way, i got to see the famous AIIMS flyover, Delhi Haat and a few other places of interest.

After we got there, I insisted on walking up to the India gate even tough it was terribly hot outside. As i walking up towards it i felt a sense of awe creeping over me. I walked closer and began to read the inscription on it. I dont remember the exact words now, but i do remember they were very well written. Filled me with a kinda pride for my country that i cant put in words. We then asked a guy with a camera to click our photo infront of the India gate with our camera. The poor guy was so sweet, he clicked our picture even though its his business to click photographs of people posing in front of the gate. I thought what the heck. I gave him the requisite 50 bucks and asked him to click a picture of us through his camera now. And i wasnt dissapointed with the result. The photo came out quite well. I was particulatly impressed at the enterprise of these people!Aquiring expired polaroid prints at throwaway prices and using these to make a living out of clicking pictures of enthusiastic tourists(like myself). Ingenious!

From the India gate, we proceeded towards Rashtrapati Bhavan. As we approached the sprawlig structure, we were greeted with what has to be the smallest traffic signal beacon in the world! It is housed in a minaret like structure bang in the middle of the intersection with 4 such small beacons on each side of the minaret! The beacon goes green and we start to move towards the main gate of Rashtrapati Bhavan slowly. As we approach the beautiful structure, i cant help but notice the colonial architechture, the HUGE wrought iron gates, the sprawling landscaping. Fit for a President!

We then proceeded towards Parliment House which i got to see from the car since we werent allowed to stop our vehicles there. We then went to Connaught Place to have lunch. We had some good Chinese food at a place called Nirula's. Then i had a sumptous chocolate eclair and picked up sinful chocolate chip cookies for aai at home. From Nirula's we went off to our 2nd ajor attraction of the day. The Metro!

Now as you enter the Metro station you are greeted by will lit corridors, spankingly clean enviornments, lucid directions and most of all, the feeling of welcoming!We move to the ticket counter and ask for a route which will take an hour to and fro. We decide to take the metro from Rajiv Chowk(station where we were right now) to Rajouri Garden. Fare? A mere Rs. 16/- per head. Now as we move to the spanking platform, D and I start to click pictures even though i recall seeing somewhere that photography is prohibited. D takes them blatantly. Me discreetely. And sure enough, after bout 2 mins D is hauled up by the security personnel for clicking pictures. The pester him for about 2 mins and then let him go with a warning. We silently board the train(which has arrived till then) and take our seats for this momentous ride.

As the ride progresses, i get more and more impressed with the Metro. The approaching stations announcement, the graphic displays of the route, the timing of opening and closing of the doors, the speed of travel, the comfort of travel, the cleanliness inside the cabin were simply brilliant. And add to that a frequency of 5 mins, you have a surefire winner on your hands. No wonder almost all shuttles run full!

With our Metro ride to and from Rajouri Garden we head back out to Connaught Place where D's girlfriend heads off home and we move our butts to the shopping paradise for computer geeks: Palika Bazaar! You are frisked while entering this shopping spectacle. An irony of sorts considering that 99% of the shops in Palika Bazaar are run by the underworld. But nevertheless, we enter and head straight for the game cd stores. The first store(or stall if i may call it) we stop at has a smiley young individual at the helm peddling his wares. We browse through about 400 CDs and DVDs and pick up about 6. Average price Rs. 60/- each! Thereon, we move to a store selling movie DVDs. There after browsing and pestering the guy for about 45 minutes, i pick up 2 DVDs. One a Clint Eastwood compilation with Where Eagles Dare, The Good The Bad The Ugly and Firefox and one with all the four Harry Potters. Then i pick up a Zippo lighter set for my dad and a nasty looking knife for myself. Then a USB joystick for gaming! D shops for a few more arbit stuff and we head out of Palika Bazaar with our pockets considerably lighter, albeit with hands considerably heavier(what with carrying all that stuff). We now start to walk through Connaught place and suddenly D scream out "I smell KFC!". The man keeps walking and find a KFC 20 metres from the place where he exclaimed before! And then says "I didnt know there was a KFC in CP". Eventually it turned out they had just opened a week back. D had just smelt KFC out! Unbelievable! Talk about your canine attributes!

We then moseyed along to a restaurant called PiccaDelhi in CP where we were supposed to meets D's parents and a few of their family friends for "early" dinner. It was a quaint place with English decor all around, but with a menu that served worldly cuisines. We were the first of our party to arrive. By and by everyone started to trickle in and by about 8:15 pm all 10 of us had settled down in our seats. Now i ordered a fettuchini pasta in wine sauce along with a Grren Attack mocktail which had aam panna, mint, line and all the greens of the drink world!Was pretty good!Cant say the same bout the pasta though. It was just bout OK. However, we were kept very well entertained throughout our meal by an actor who was masquarading as Charlie Chaplin. And he was doing quite a good job of it! He kept taking pot shots at all the waiters and mingled with all the guests aside from doing his normal routine. Pretty entertaining!

After al the commercial angles were settled, we all trudged back to Nirula's for ice cream. That done, we said goodbye to our guests for the eve and D, his mom, his dad and your truly set off for home in his dad's Honda CRV.Yes a CRV! My first ride in the premium softroader and i wasnt at all dissapointed. On the way home, i got to see the famous(well now infamous) Delhi Public School, Mathura Road. On getting home, we got to the computer immediately. We were dying to try out all the stuff that we had bought earlier at Palika Bazaar. Well most of the stuff worked except a few of the DVDs and a couple of CDs. Soon we had installed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and were going "Kawabunga"! Slept at 3 again!

Next day we woke up late again and spent the entire day indoors resting and sheilding ourselves from the scorching sun and oppressive heat. For dinner i had a scotch with fish and chips!Mmmmmm...We finished it off with mangoes! Watched America Pie 4 - Band Camp and then dozed off.

Monday we decided to go to Palika Bazaar again. To return the stuff that hadnt worked. We decided to take the metro from Dwarka instead of driving all the way down to CP again. The road to Dwarka was simply amazing. Baby butt smooth with trees all around, well marked out directions and the works. The road network in our country is definitely moving in the right direction. The Metro station at Dwarka was another well laid out destination and being a terminus we got a shuttle within 2 mins. The ride to CP took just a shade under an hour. We then had lunch at KFC with another friend who i hadnt met since i got into Delhi. Post lunch we moseyed along to Palika bazaar again and went place to exchange the stuff. That done we walked back to the metro station and amde a beeline for home as soon as we got down at Dwarka. We were totally pooped!

D's parents took me out for dinner that evening to a place called the Golden dragon. It was a good place, good food, with incredible portions in each dish! Satiated, we all made our way back home and i was so tired by then, that after an hour of TMNT, i hit the sack.

Woke up early next morning and wasnt feeling a 100%. However, we had a lunch decided so i went along to this place called The Big Chill in East of Kailash for exclsively authentic Italian food. On the way over, D showed me this street off MG road where they have all these temples. It will simply blow you away! The amount and size of the temples there is incredible! I was staring with my mouth agape for the entire duration we were on that street. Soon we picked D's girlfriend up and made our way to Big Chill. D and his girlfriend ordered the shrimp pasta while i ordered a veggie pizza. Post that, for dessert i had the much recommended, squiggy cake. Was quite delicious i have to say!And the food was quite authentic too!After lunch, we headed home and i got a tour of Siri Fort on the way. This is the place where the 2010 Commenwealth games will be held. Was a good facility, but need some work before it can be ready to host such a huge event. But theve got time and iam sure theyll make it upto the mark.

Getting home, i was already feeling low. I got into bed immediatey and was soon diagnosed with fever running at 103 deg F. I did my packing swaggering side to side, had my dinner, spoke to two of my best friends in Pune, who gave me tips on as to how to make it back home in 1 piece, talked to aai, popped a pill and crashed. Woke up next morning drenched in sweat, but with fever gone. I dressed hurridely and it was time to bid my hosts goodbye. I got through that and as i approached the car in hte parking below i looked back at the house that had been my home for the past 6 days. I was going back yes. But with cherished memories.

Now the ride to the airport was a revealation in itself. For D, on how to get to the airport in the maximum possible time and for me as to how to keep calm when the eventuality of missing your flight is staring you in face. But we managed to get there in time and i bid farewell to my buddy, my roomie for 6 days! As i walked to the Air Deccan check in counter i was both excited(at the prospect of going back home) and sad(at my trip coming to an end). As i was waiting in for the secutrity check, i noticed a board displaying the people who did not have to go through the security check procedure. The list included The Prime Minister, The President, Union Ministers, Chief Justice of India, Visiting Foriegn Disgnitaries, Ambassadors etc etc. One name at the end of the list caught my eye and left me flabbergasted. The name was... ROBERT VADRA! Why does Robert Vadra need a free pass through security? Who is he? Just cause he is Sonia Gandhi's son-in-law? Talk about sucking up to the "queen"!

Now Air Deccan was quite a different experience from Kingfisher. To say the least. First of all the flight took off 45 minutes late. Reason being that the Delhi airport radar had failed. Yeah right! Nevertheless, the aircraft by itself was great. The people in it though were far from it. The atmosphere in the plane was more like a ST bus in the air. But isnt that what Air Decan is? A low cost people carrier? Case closed.

I finally made it back to Pune at 12:00 pm. After the de rigeur wait at the baggage claim i headed out to see my sis waiting for me. Never felt so good to be home!But never felt so good to go somewhere either!

Hasna Jaroori hai??

Lets pan back 3 days back...I switch on my cell phone at 9:30 am and it croons the theme of Bunty Aur Babli...SMS received....I open the message to view it and see this "How about Darna Jaroori Hai saturday night?...At City Pride..Let me know immidiately so we can snag the tickets!"....Sender: Ms. AV..soon to be Mrs. AG...marrying one of my best friends she is.....My reply was .."YES!".....so everything was arranged...tickets for 8:00 pm show sat night were booked....and at 7:30 pm sat nite i get a threatening message from Ms. AV "Be at the theatre by 7:40 pm sharp!!..I dont want to miss the start!Mr. P la pan saang"....So me and Mr. P reach there a teeny weeny bit late...thanks to my hunger pangs...but still well in time to find out that we are seated in row O...Thats 2 rows away from the screen!!....I make my displeasure obvious..at which i get a strict reprimand from Ms. AV...."Mag svatah ticket kadhayla kay zhala hota??(Then why didnt you get the tickets yourself)!"...I shut my mouth thereafter and sit in my seat comfortably(or uncomfortably??)...Listening to Himesh bhai crooning out Jara Jhoom Jhoom from Tom, Dick and Harry(How can you name a film that?????) ....We have our usual argument on who is better, Rehman or Reshamiyya....Well as far the charts go, the answer is obvious....Nevertheless....Soon the promos of forthcoming movies start....One look at the Krrish promo and we all burst out laughing...even though we have seen it like 20 times before....Mr. P, infamous for his humourous sarcasm, dishes out a gem...how bout renaming it "Crouching Rakesh, Hidden Roshan.."..That makes Ms. AV(and quite a few partrons around us) burst out into peels of laughter....Then its the turn of Phir Hera Pheri ...and all of us say in almost pretimed unision..."Ha nakki pahichach aahe(we HAVE to see this one!)"....

Soon the certificate for Darna Jaroori Hai comes up...It has a "A" rating...and at that precise moment i hear a baby crying in one the back rows....Looks like age checks have ceased to exist in theatres....So much for "A" ratings....The movie has started by now..i shift my focus now to the immensely fat dude on the screen arguing with his mom to allow him to go through a graveyard...even though there is a chudail who comes out there....I mean...gimme a break....thats hardly scary....

Thats how it continued throughout the whole movie....Whole lot of cliched situations..like 5 kids with a old lady in an old castle....Reminded me of Scooby Doo..minus the charm of Scooby or Shaggy....Inane story lines....Amitabh is wasted....Arjun Rampal should stick to modelling.....Rajpal Yadav, as usual, impresses..Sunil Shetty, as usual, does not....The Anil Kapoor story(well almost the entire movie) had the entire theatre in splits...with oblique..no..quite direct references to Karan Johar...and his style of films....RGV has bitten hard into him....but otherwise that story is barely watchable...unless ofcourse you were focussing on Mallika's bust...and let alone scary...unless ofcourse you were focussing on Mallika's acting...

So all in all i can give the movie 1/2 a star...HOPELESS!!!!....And end with these lines:

"Dekhna Mana Hai, Hasna Jaroori Hai, Darna Namumkin Hai!!"

Match This!

It all started with a phone call last friday...Sandeep called me up "Are Akya match la yenaar aahes ka?Aatach saang mhanje tujha pan ticket sangto!" (For non-maharastrians, literal translation "Hey akash, do you wanna come watch the match?Tell me now so i can book a ticket for you as well").....My reply was "Mhanje Kay!!!!"...(Again for non-maharashtrians, "Hell Yeah!!!")....Then i get the confirmation on Monday...Our tickets are through!...Wo!..We were going to watch the match!LIVE!!!

3rd of november was a holiday...even if it wasnt i wasnt gonna go to office...Iam not touched in the head!..For those who think what is all the fuss about...so its just another cricket match...big deal...well....i got news...Cricket match in Pune...Nehru Stadium....India playing a top side like SL (well, not so much on top right now..but nevertheless....)...all top stars fit and playing...India 3-0 up in the series..and a chance to see Sachin, Sehwag and Co. bat in flesh in blood...well...thats what all the fuss is about!...

I woke up today at 5:30 am!..Man i havent seen what 5:30 am looks like in years!...Had my tea and got ready to leave my house by 6:20..picked up Satya (a friend)...and rode down to Grahak Peth on Tilak road to park our bikes in my friend's office building....and walked a good 1 km to Gate no. 5...the entry point for all us troopers...12 of us....and quite a motley bunch we were...ages ranging from 12 right upto 40....Now we had picked up rs. 300 tickets, the cheapest of the lot (just consider the following surnames and you shall know why Rs. 300; Apte, Gokhale, Pendse, Shrotri, Phadnis...get my drift?;o))...which was a big mistake..something on which i will elaborate later..anyways.....so we were people from all walks of life...we got to the gate at 7:15....as we expected..no bottles of water allowed....nothing plastic...we hadnt taken anything anyways..so that didnt bother us much....and after various security checks we finally got inside the stand...and scrambled to get good seats...well...good patches of concrete...and ended up right in front of the pitch..good patches of concrete..we could see the action pretty straight...

We were settled in our seats..umm..patches by 8:00...and then sat and stared at the ground..watching the teams practice...Ladi (Nikhil) had brought along a scoring sheet and we were all poring over it...Sri Lankans in one corner and Indians in the other...the stands kept filling...and soon enough..as the start time grew nearer our stand was soon bursting at the seams...people were even sitting the aisles...it was a great atmosphere around the stadium...an expectant buzz....as Dravid and Attapatu walked in for the toss with Ravi Shastri...and grew to a deafening roar as Dravid won the toss...as usual everybody expeccting India to bat..but Dravid chose to bowl..which created a few dissapointed faces...many people seem to think that the only reason why cricket needs to be watched is for India batting..rest all is consequential..he he...but nevertheless...the innings began with roars and hoops of joy...every dot ball was being cheered...and every run being jeered...and soon Sangakarra was back on his way to the pavillion..deafening roar again...and this continued for the entire innings....cheers and jeers...mexican waves...erate spectators..which reminds me of an ugly scene..i was heading out of the stands in the middle of the Sri Lankan innings to strtch my legs a bit...and to give my butt a break...and for some stupid reason the officials had shut the exi near the place where we were sitting...so we had to make out way all the way to the next enit..about 70 m from where we were sitting....and since the aisles were occupied by people as well...it got difficult...and ugly..as one grop of dadas (not remotely in the brotherly sense) refused to let us by....anyhow...we got out and back...with considerable difficulty..and amidst a lot of foul language and curses...but then...the cricket is worth all this!.he he..

Anyways, after teh lankan innings ended, lunch was merely a formality..a vada pav..being sold at Rs. 10 each..talk about stadium robbery!...and a few biscuits and oily samosas...a complete meal right?..he he...and due to a scarcity of good water....we had rasna....better than jostling with a few hundred people for buying Pepsi...anyhow, our hunger satiated (temporarily i might add), we sat down to stave off a hunger of another kind..a hunger to see Viru and Sachin to cart the Lankan bowlers all over the park...

The innings started..slowly at first..and then very slowly..and then Sachin got out..after a few lucky edges...Pindrop Silence!...the entire stadium went HUSH!....this is still the "shock & awe"; read respect and expectation the man comnmands...well he was replaced ny Yuvraj on the crease...who poked around a bit and then got out as well..anyways..soon things settled down after "The Wall" came in.....and then thirst pangs began to strike us....so we sent one of the kids in our group to fetch some water....and went he did...and came back with 20 pouches of water...for 100 bucks..cheap right?...he he..nways...we opened them up thirstily like desert wanderers...only to find that the water tasted like liquid metal..yes..it was that bad!...2 sips and 20 pouches were thrown right back into the box they were brought in...Sick!..

Anyways, as the innings prgressed it all resumed, the cheers, the jeers, the mexican waves...the pindrop silences..like when Sehwag fell on 48 and Dravid on 62..it was all there!..and at 190/6 all the people had worried looks on their faces..will we?...or wont we?...well..Mr. M S Dhoni had the answer..WE WILL!..and he made sure we did..in style..finshing off the match with a couple of HUGE hits straight back down the ground..a treat to watch!

Soon we had left the stadium after the presentation..our butts aching...my head aching...hunger ruling the roost..but warmth in our hearth...that India had won!..and won convincingly...All the bad arrangements, dirty spectators, uncouth youths, hard steps, tepid water, expensive vada pavs were forgotten in this joy!

However we all came out of the stadium with a unanimous decision...next time..BUY THE Rs. 1500/- tickets!;o)